After a long time of willingly distracting myself from my past and forging forward, I have decided it is time to barrel into it.
I was left by my mother at age 2, so my dad took me. My grandparents found bruises on my bum and took custody of me.
That’s all fine and dandy, as I don’t remember any of it. But I have gone to therapy, and I know that these events affect who I am today.
I need to understand it. My grandparents have now left Toronto, and it is time to focus on the life I am building for myself and for them.
I asked my grandma to bring her journals. They catalogue her perspective from the time she took custody of me at 2, until 5.
The idea in seeking these answers, is to put things into perspective. It is time to heal, and become more well-equipped for my future as an actor.
Please understand, that none of this is about condemning any of the parties involved. My intent is not malicious. I recognize that my mom and dad were too young to have me. I know that they love me, and I have wanted for nothing while being raised by my grandparents.
This is something that is hard for me to do. I have read just a tiny bit and I can feel her pain through every line.
This is when I break into the serenity prayer.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Please pray or put good vibes into the universe for me. I will be reflecting through prose and poetry in the upcoming blogs. Please note the word “reflecting.” Some posts may be specifically related to me, and others will only be inspired by what I find in these journals.
Also, don’t hesitate to comment, or to e mail me personally.